As children get
older, it's important to discuss the meaning and purpose of diligent efforts. Make
it clear that jobs are not done for drudgery's sake, but to create value, make a
profit, or serve people, or even a greater good. Kids need to learn that there
is a purpose to all of this -- that doing a job well makes one a better person
and enhances character and value in others’ eyes, and in God’s eyes. One way
parents can start this discussion with their kids is by sharing their own work
experiences -- good and bad -- and talk about the lessons learned and how they
were shaped by those experiences. If parents
can show kids how work contributes to the family's well-being, children will be
more positive about chores
My Mother made
a to-do list of daily or weekly household jobs and posted it on the Kitchen wall.
We did not have choices, we HAD to do what was assigned, or there would
be a price to pay. In our home, we don't
let the kids opt out. But giving kids a choice of chores does help make work
more tolerable. Adding incentives can
sometimes actually make work fun.
Contests –( i.e.,
for Fastest Room-Cleaner or Best at
Vacuuming) -- get kids more involved, as do rewards. Going out to a favorite park or restaurant,
renting a movie, or inviting friends for sleepovers are just a few ways that
parents can reward hard work.
In real life,
work isn't always fun -- sometimes the boss isn't fair, customers are rude, and
hours at work seem to drag by. Expect kids to complain a bit about their jobs.
Let them vent -- in fact, encourage it. After all, adults sometimes gripe about
their jobs too. But be ready to offer encouragement, and let the children know
that hard work isn’t always supposed to be great fun, or even enjoyable,
although it can be enjoyable!
Kids learn good
work habits when the parents walk the walk. That means showing kids that work
is part of a balanced, healthy life. For example, in our family, we have taken
on second jobs, worked overtime, and even worked for free at times in our
lives. Our son has observed these times,
and has discovered that doing extra work to get ahead sometimes can be beneficial,
if it does not take priority over the family consistently. We talk regularly about chosing a career or
life work that you love. We talk about
education, earning potential in certain jobs, and about improving your life
through work choices. We are sure to
emphasize that it is NOT always about making The Most Money, or about Buying
Things. But the fact is that at least
one person in our son’s future family will need to earn an income, so we want
him to be clear on the options.
Kids will not
always do their tasks well. But we muxt resist the urge to step in and take
over. If the child fails to water the plant, it may be helpful in the longrun
to let it wilt. If children have trouble on a job (or even get fired) because they fail to show up on time or do the
job correctly, don't make excuses for them. Let them learn that their actions
or inactions have consequences. Talk about what happened, and ask them what
they can do to keep from repeating the mistake.
